To a great extent, we live in a culture that resists and fears unpleasant emotion. From the time we were babies we were taught to quickly shut off unpleasant feelings like anger or sadness. Yet, learning to suppress, numb or overly control our emotions has serious consequences.
We some time can spend hours on Facebook avoiding our feelings. Or we can eat the whole pan of brownies. One common way of numbing our worries and other unpleasant feelings is by staying very, very busy.
A sure way to increase your emotional health is by gently touching your unpleasant feelings, giving them their rightful place in your life and the time they deserve.
You don’t have to try to change what you are feeling, you just have to give yourself permission to feel it fully. Instead of trying to roughly push your unpleasant feelings away cradle them gently.
Accept your unpleasant feelings.
Give them time to communicate their important message, and when they are ready to leave they will.
Don’t put negative judgement on certain emotions rather accept all emotions for what they are.
A small study from Olin University published in 2013 showed that being comfortable with experiencing and expressing mixed emotions was a predictor of improvements in well-being, while ignoring or evading unpleasant feelings was not associated with boosts in well-being.
Below is my ultimate collection of 66 insightful quotes, informative short videos, and links to useful articles that will help you to heal and transform all of your emotional pain into emotional freedom, happiness and awesomeness.
42 Insightful Quotes About Emotions, Emotional Pain and Emotional Freedom
"Let's not forget that the little emotions are the great captains of our lives and we obey them without realizing it."
-Vincent Van Gogh
"When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion."
"The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it."
"But feelings can't be ignored, no matter how unjust or ungrateful they seem."
"To give vent now and then to his feelings, whether of pleasure or discontent, is a great ease to a man's heart. "
"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain."
"One's suffering disappears when one lets oneself go, when one yields — even to sadness."
-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
"One thing you can't hide - is when you're crippled inside."
"When our emotional health is in a bad state, so is our level of self-esteem."
-Jess C. Scott
"The feeling is often the deeper truth, the opinion the more superficial one."
-Augustus William Hare
"The irony is that a large share of emotional pain in life is due to feeling bad about feeling bad."
"The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy."
"We take emotional responsibility when we compassionately embrace our core feelings with deep kindness and gentleness toward ourselves, allowing ourselves to feel and release these painful feelings, and learning about what they may be telling us."
- Dr. Margaret Paul
"The only way to change someone's mind is to connect with them from the heart."
"Sometimes we can't let go of the pain because we think it's the one thing holding us together."
"Your intellect may be confused, but your emotions will never lie to you."
"Clouds open up into rain, you too should release your pain."
"Nobody can hurt me without my permission."
"Part of having a full life is feeling all of your emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant."
"You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well."
-Lewis B. Smedes
"When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you."
- African Proverb
"Feelings are like toes! They have to breathe free or they'll stink to high heaven."
"All emotion is involuntary when genuine."
"We are at our most powerful the moment we no longer need to be powerful."
-Eric Micha'el Leventhal
"I want people to love me, but it's not going to hurt me if they don't."
"If you can sit with your pain, listen to your pain and respect your pain — in time you will move through your pain."
"We cannot selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions."
"Never apologize for being sensitive or emotional. It’s a sign that you have a big heart, and that you aren’t afraid to let others see it. Showing your emotions is a sign of strength."
"When you numb sadness, you also numb happiness and joy."
"Devoting myself to processing my feelings, rather than letting them build up until they drained me, began to shift and transform my life."
"Anyone in the throes of an eating disorder, addiction, workaholism, or sex addiction can tell you that constantly trying to run from your emotions is exhausting."
"The worst thing you can do to yourself is to sweep your emotions under the carpet. It is dangerous to your health. Don’t deny your emotions. Feel them as it is the beginning of healing to every pain."
"Experiencing your emotions and being vulnerable with the people that you trust is a sign of true strength, not a weakness."
"Admitting pain humbles us to the reality of our personal histories and our present conditions. We no longer have to pretend we are something that we are not."
"To honestly feel the positive things in life — to truly feel love, or joy, or profound gratitude — we must also let ourselves feel fear, and grief, and frustration."
"Don’t be harsh or demanding on yourself. Just experience your feelings and know that your tears are announcing change in your life. "
"Ultimately, the way to heal and move through painful experiences is to let yourself feel."
"The problem is that when we numb unpleasant feelings, we numb everything that we are feeling."
"Feeling our emotions is very different from allowing them to rule our behavior."
"Our wounded feelings are telling us that we are abandoning ourselves in some way - ignoring our feelings and needs, judging ourselves, turning to various addictions to avoid our feelings, or making others responsible for our feelings"
-Dr. Margaret Paul
"Don’t judge your emotions. No emotion is “bad.” Feelings are just feelings; they sometimes offer clues into your past and insight into what specific adaptations you made to cope early in your life."
"Take Action: What feeling have you been distracting yourself from lately? Take 90 seconds right now to just feel it."
16 Informative Videos on How to Transform Emotional Pain into Emotional Freedom
1. Welcoming All Emotions with Total Love & Acceptance
2. Accept Negative Emotional Energy
3. How To Accept Negative Emotions
4. Positively Embrace Your Unpleasant Emotions - Teal Swan
5. How to Benefit From Unpleasant Emotions
6. The ''Negative'' Emotions You Resist will Only Persist
7. The Art Of Releasing Emotional Pain
8. What You Resist Persists (How To Stop Resisting What's Persisting!)
9. How To Feel – Allowing Yourself To Feel Your Feelings Fully
10. How To Feel Better – 4 Barriers To Healing Emotional Pain And How To Break Through
11. Quick Tip What You Resist Persists
12. Why Allowance Is the Key to Your Freedom
13. How To Feel Your Feelings Fully
14. ''What You Resist Persists''
8 Helpful Articles on Transforming Emotional Pain into Emotional Freedom
1. The Upside of Negative Emotions: Why Feeling Fully Leads to a Better Life
How can we best deal with our day-to-day emotional reactions? What can we do when our partner lets us down, when we have a struggle with our child, or when we feel provoked by a friend? Oddly enough, the first piece of advice is to stay with the pain.
It turns out we expend much more energy avoiding the pains of our existence than we do when we actually face our feelings. Often, we cause ourselves much more misery through our attempts to defend against our unpleasant emotions. Also, in trying not to feel our feelings, we become unnecessarily defended and many times end up hurting others.
2. How to Feel Your Feelings and What That Will Do for Your Life (Everything!)
Feeling your emotions brightens your life, both internally and externally.
You already have every answer you will ever need inside of you; you just need to learn how to access that information. Answers about your relationships, your life direction, how to take care of your health, how to move toward what you want. Translating what your feelings are trying to tell you provides a direct conduit to your own higher wisdom.
You already have all the answers you will ever need inside of you—and your emotions are a primary vehicle for those answers. Learning the language of your feelings will give you your own personal Sherpa through life.
3. 5 Ways to Feel Your Feelings Fully & Deepen the Connection with Yourself
Right up into my twenties, I created the habit of resisting emotions and avoiding what I was feeling. Repressing emotions rather than experiencing them. Or, being overly reactive and dramatizing my experience when feelings bubbled up and sought expression.
Denying our emotions creates inner turmoil and perpetuates the emotional experience. And through this resistance, emotions become stuck in our body. Whether it's defensiveness, anger, sadness, or something else, the resistance is usually accompanied by a personal 'story' that justifies our reactions, keeping the emotion alive, often by attributing the cause of the emotional experience to something or someone outside our self.
4. Healing Emotions By Fully Feeling Them
Healing emotions takes a shift from thinking to actually feeling our emotions, and working them through. Feeling our feelings doesn’t actually take much time.
What takes time is all the ways we avoid feeling our emotions and all the time we spend caught up in emotional reactions! Healing our emotions is not about thinking about them or avoiding them or reacting to them. These are all ways we slow down the process of healing emotions.
In other words, healing occurs when we make the shift from thinking about our issue to feeling our feelings.
What do we mean by feeling feelings? This is very different than being caught up in a torrent of emotional reactions. It is different from having a lot of feelings come up.
5. Feeling Your Emotions Fully
Our society does not accept emotions. We are expected to move through life like robots, go to work function whether we have anything of an emotional nature going on in our lives or not.
Keeping your emotions internalized keeps you stuck. Holding on to anger, pain, suffering and sadness causes long-term side effects and illness. We have got to start feeling our emotions fully. When you have something sad happen in your lives, take the time to cry. Don’t rush back to work before you are ready to deal with the day-to-day until you are ready.
We are soul beings having a physical experience. We have emotions. It is time to acknowledge them and feel our emotions fully. Keeping feelings of sadness and grief stuffed beneath a facade only causes us to be defended. When we are defended we become reactive when little bumps in the road of life appear.
6. Why Fully Feeling Your Feelings Is the Key to Happiness and Freedom
So I did something crazy: I allowed myself to stop all the constant chatter that was in my head. I sat quietly and let myself feel. And did I ever feel. All these feelings came flooding in: Guilt. Anger. Despair. Sadness.
By not judging my feelings, by not making them right or wrong or giving them power over me, I learned to simply use them as a gauge for what I needed in that very moment.
I was now able to love my body no matter what the number on the scale was because I was no longer controlling my body as a distraction from my feelings.
I learned to not fight the feeling of being uncomfortable and to just accept it. This enabled me to hold my daughter while she cried and know that it was enough to just be there; I didn’t need to control or ''fix it.''
7. A Technique for Feeling Painful Feelings
Many of us avoid feeling our feelings because we worry that feeling them will be more painful than just pretending they don’t exist. Or we assume they’ll simply skulk away (and stay away permanently).
8. Embrace Your Pain to Raise Your Vibration
Because we know that feeling good is what gets us what we want, it is natural to begin to develop some fear about pain and other negative feelings. Many of us begin to see pain as a “wrong” feeling that keeps us from having what we want.
Because we’ve defined pain as “wrong,” many of us seek to ignore or avoid it, in order to keep it from lowering our vibrations.
Though this makes logical sense, unfortunately actions to ignore or avoid pain only prevent us from finding vibrational alignment.